Friday, November 29, 2013

Florida State Quarterback Jameis Winston Urinated in Public Pool, Involved in Gum-Chewing Incident


The institution of higher learning received a major setback with the current news stating Florida State quarterback Jameis Winston was involved in a BB gun shooting incident followed by stealing fountain soda at a Tallahassee, Florida Burger King.

The crisis has sent shockwaves throughout FSU's campus.

Gone are the days of good, clean fun depicted in classic college films such as Animal House and Old School where alcohol and drug abuse were commonplace  seldom did shenanigans occur. 

Universities have tried to escape the stigma college is a site to meet new people and experiment with illicit substances. What Winston committed goes beyond heinous.

According to an FSU student, who wishes to remain anonymous, "I'm pretty sure Jameis peed in the pool at West 10 (apartment complex) once." The student continued with a mournful expression and glassy eyes, "He chewed gum in class, too. When will the football team realize they're hurting all of us."

Considering college students rarely make mindless mistakes, the news of Winston's follies, combined with the ongoing alleged sexual assault investigation, has made the number one Heisman contender quite the easy target.

Those who live in glass houses...

The number two Seminoles take on the Florida Gators on Saturday at noon.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Noles 82 Gators 9.